Lightning and Thunder

CHAPTER 1

(JUDITH)

Tears blurred my eyes as I watched my best friend, who had become more like a sister to me, stare at the doctor in shocked disbelief.

Her lips moved but no words came out.

I didn’t know what to feel. Why, of all times, could this be happening to Nisha? To us?

Last month, she accidentally found a lump at the side of her breast while examining herself in front of a mirror.

She wanted to ignore it but a nagging fear constantly mauled her. What if…? I did my best to assuage her fear and even joked about it, trying to take her mind off it.

My methods were inefficient. Today, Nisha begged me to accompany her to the hospital to get the results of her test.

“I’m so sorry, ma’am. The results show an extreme case of breast cancer. It’s malignant,” the doctor repeated in his monotonous voice.

The finality of the pronouncement hit us like a sledgehammer. Nisha was going to die? Heck, no! This had to be a nightmare and I would wake up from it in no time. A terse moment passed and I knew the doctor wasn’t pulling our legs.

“Are you saying there are no options? What about chemotherapy?” I stuttered when I finally found my voice.

The doctor sighed, removed his spectacle and leaned forward, his fingers steepled on the wide, cluttered desk. “That will do more harm than good. The cancer has spread all over her body. Even surgery cannot help.”

It all slowly started making sense. Nisha’s constant weariness and dizziness lately. Her headaches. The incessant complaint of nausea. The weird change in her monthly flow. How she had almost fainted when we had our most recent fasting spree. Why on earth had I teased her that day that she was becoming carnal? What was I thinking? I was a bad friend, for me not to have noticed that something was wrong with my soul sister.

I glanced at Nisha uncertainly. She looked pale as though she had been frozen by a Medusa stare.

I grasped the last of the doctor’s words as he rounded off his depressing presentation of what our options were for the limited period of survival Nisha supposedly had left. Thanking him—for what, I didn’t know—I stood and led Nisha out. She remained stone silent, unresponsive all through. I began to fear for her mental well-being. When it came to matters like these, Nisha could be an emotional mess.

Trying to cheer her up, I drove to her favourite ice cream spot, but she didn’t even squeal in delight when I ordered our favourite combo—Chocolate and vanilla swirl with strawberry toppings.

She just stared at the cone I put in her hand, eyes glazed. The ice cream began to melt.

“Nisha,” I called and lightly touched her hand. She flinched and looked at me. Her eyes were tinted with pink streaks of pain.

“Why, why me, Judith?” Her coarse whisper came out broken. I couldn’t stop the tears that ran down my cheeks.

“Why would God allow this? My mother, my aunt, they died of this same disease…”

I knew about that. I saw her struggle when her mother died in her first year of university. Then, her second mother figure followed shortly after her graduation. It was a rough patch for her, one she barely scaled through.

“I have prayed and fasted. If it’s an ancestral curse God should let it pass over me. I have declared words of faith over my life. I have sown seeds. I’m supposed to be getting married next month. What will I tell Austin?” With that, she broke down into a full-blown wail right there and then in the middle of the ice cream spot. A few customers were beginning to look at us weirdly and whisper questions.

I gathered myself together and used my glare to shoo them off. If only they knew that the world of my BFF had just collapsed, as had mine, they wouldn’t be looking at us so judgementally.

Holding Nisha’s trembling form upright, I led her to her car and buckled her in.

As I drove the car to the cosy apartment in Kimono Lane which we shared, I prayed under my breath in tongues while my friend sobbed like a baby till her eyes became puffy from the strain.

I took her into the well-decorated apartment and sat with her in the cushioned love seat, petting her as I wept along.

“It’s okay if God wants me to come home now,” she said as she blew her nose into the kerchief I had given her.

“Don’t you dare say that. You have to hold on to faith,” I chided.

She took in a shuddering breath and shook her head.

“It’s pointless. I have terminal cancer, Judith! Your pep talk won’t change my status.”

“It’s not mere pep talk, sis. And we both know the One who can change your status. Have you forgotten so easily? Jesus, the very same God who saved you from the old life of bondage, loves you. I’m sure this is not His will for you. This is an antic of the enemy.”

She narrowed her eyes at me. “How can you be so sure?”

“If wicked earthly parents know how to give good gifts to their children, how much more will your heavenly father give you good things?”

“Yeah right, but God didn’t heal Moses’s stammer nor did he take away the thorn in Paul’s flesh.”

“Stop taking bible stories out of context. God did that to those two to make them reliant on him because of the great assignment and power he had given them. Remember third John? Beloved I wish above all things…”

She cracked a tiny smile. “…That thou mayest prosper and be in health even as thy soul prospers.”

“That’s my Nisha talking! I’m not going to permit you to despair, talk less of dying. We’re going to fight this together, you, I and the host of heaven. I’m gonna take on the mantle of the persistent widow and knock so hard on the gates of heaven that the angelic gate guards will have no choice but to give me access to the courts of heaven. I’m gonna wear my armour and march through the gates of hell to fight the enemy. You’re not dying, Nisha. Not on my watch.”

I held her hands tight. She chuckled and looked at me, fresh hope in her eyes. “I should call you daughter of thunder, girl,” she said.

I grinned, happy her humour had returned. “Then you’d be the princess of lightning, my lady,” I said with a fake British accent and a half bow.

She laughed briefly. I did too, though my heart was still clenched.

“God,” I prayed in my heart, “Nisha cannot die. Not now. She is yours. Her purpose is mighty and she must fulfil it.”

Memories of our adventures together right from the first day we met in college till now flooded my mind. This was the lady who helped me finish my education with her constant encouragement and loving financial support. She had become the sister I never had. The fact that I had been disowned by my family because I became a believer thanks to Nisha’s influence made her my centre of gravity.

“Thank you, sis,” she said slowly, moments later, her voice laced with emotion.

“Anytime,” I whispered, patting her hand.

Suddenly, her phone buzzed, breaking our ethereal moment. She fished it out of her purse.

Panic flooded her eyes again as she looked at her screen.
“Oh my God. It’s Austin. What do I tell him?”

I swallowed, ignoring the pang in my heart. “The truth.”

“The truth? Judith, are you crazy? How can you say it as if it’s a piece of cake?”

I shrugged. “Well, if he is indeed God’s will for you, he’ll stay and fight this storm with you.”

With shaking hands, she swiped the green circle up and placed it to her ear. Meanwhile, I zoned out their conversation and began a desperate inner prayer that Austin would remain as level-headed as he had seemed when he proposed to Nisha.
I prayed he would act like the godly man I knew him as.

***

CHAPTER 2

(NISHA)

I couldn’t tell my friend that her talk did little or nothing to help. She would be shattered. If she could hold on to the last thread of hope for me, maybe God would have mercy on my soul.

I alone knew the real reason behind my ailment. It went beyond a mere ancestral curse passed down from my mother’s lineage as I had insinuated.

Even though it was partly through my influence that Judith came to know Christ—I invited her to my fellowship when we met in the department in college—she had grown stronger than me in many areas.

Her walk with God was progressive and enviable. Her faith was strong. I, on the other hand? I was barely surviving. I had ugly secrets buried beneath a picture-perfect facade. And I was constantly walking on broken bottles. My good works and service were my desperate ways to win God’s favour. I always felt I was not good enough.

The reason behind my terminal sickness? I had angered my spirit husband, Crio.
Yes, I was married to a demonic entity and though I had no way to control the dreams, I was always depressed and afraid after they came.

I must confess, in the beginning, when Crio began to appear in my dreams, being unsaved then, a part of me relished the pleasure and acceptance he made me feel. The entry point for Crio, I believe, was when I was a little girl and my dad would come to my room whenever my mom wasn’t around. He would take off my clothes and begin to touch me inappropriately.

I wondered if that was one of the reasons my mom divorced my dad and never called him again—she must have found out that he was abusing me but she never spoke to me about it. The man simply disappeared off the surface of our lives. I was around 13 when he left.

As I grew into a teenager, my sexual urges grew to a tsunami and I was caught in the web of pornography and masturbation. That must have opened the portal wider for Crio to stake his claim on my life.

When I newly got born again, the dreams ceased and I was relieved, but then they came back out of the blues.
Things got worse after I got engaged to Austin. The dangerous part of these CHAPTERs was that Crio became more vile and forceful whenever he initiated intercourse with me without my consent. He became more intrusive so much that sometimes I would be in between reality and a dream, unable to move my body and would feel his hulking frame pressing into me.
My lips would be clamped shut, though, in my heart, I wanted to cry out Jesus’ name.

It all felt so embarrassing. I mean, I was a tongue-speaking sister back in the days in college and at a point a leader in the fellowship so I told no one about my predicament. Not even Judith.

When Austin called yesterday, I didn’t want to pick it up. Fear that I would lose him filled me.
But Judith urged me to tell him the truth. I couldn’t speak over the phone, so I told him I would come over to his place. Judith honoured my request for me to go see him alone.

“If only I was not so afraid…” I kept thinking as I drove. “I’m scared. I’m so scared. I will lose everything if I speak up. The trust of my best friend and my fiance, and finally my life. Crio will be happy about that.”

“Oh God, what have I gotten myself into? Please help me,” I cried out and hit the steering wheel repeatedly.

Austin was at his door, waiting when I arrived at his place. One look at my distraught face and he pulled me into his warm embrace. I was a wailing mess in his arms. I couldn’t lose him, not after all I sacrificed to win him over.

“Now, tell me everything,” he demanded when I had cried my eyes out and was now sitting on his sofa.

I told him I was going to die, and that we should inform our relatives and other informed parties that no wedding would be taking place.

He frowned and didn’t speak for a long while. I got more scared. He also was going to leave me. I would be alone and if I eventually died, I would be so unworthy to enter heaven that God would throw me to hell, into the cruel hands of Crio. Sweat drenched my neck and face and I held my breath, waiting for Austin to say something.

He looked at me, smiled a little wobbly smile and said, “You’re not going to die, my love. That’s not the covenant or promise God told me concerning us.”

I was stunned. My mind swept a full course at the implications.

“But, but you… I don’t want you to carry the burden of me. The cancer is terminal, didn’t you hear?”

“Our God is greater than cancer. He is greater than anything.”

I didn’t say a word. I was battling the urge to tell him everything, knowing it was a gamble with a high probability tending towards me being dumped at the end of my confession. Condemnation slammed at me from all angles and I winced.

Austin took my hands. “Hey, Nisha, God has not given you the spirit of fear. You are more than a conqueror, remember?”

I shook my head.
“I can’t do this, Austin. I can’t do this to you. You deserve someone better.”

“What are you talking about? The moment I asked for your hand in marriage, it was a commitment to also bear your pains and burdens.”

I wanted to scream at him to have a rethink of this overly heroic mission he wanted to embark on with me, that it was worthless, that I didn’t deserve it, didn’t deserve him, but I couldn’t.

If I wasn’t so afraid, maybe I’d open up to him. Maybe I would get help. But for now, I couldn’t see any light at the end of my tunnel. Maybe it would be better for me to suffer for my sins…

***

CHAPTER 3

(AUSTIN)

The extra bright headlights that momentarily blinded me startled me out of my thoughts. The blare of the trailer’s honk reverberated in my ears. I quickly swerved the car’s steering to clear it out of harm’s way, breathing heavily.

“Thank you, Jesus,” I muttered as the car’s engine died down, the monstrous vehicle that had almost crushed me slithering off with an echoing protest.

The reality that I could have died in a matter of seconds made me reconsider many things at once in a flash. My mind had been tangled with worries about Nisha, my bride-to-be. The shocking news of her incurable illness wasn’t something I had dreamed of being told in a thousand years. Nisha was a health-conscious lady who took her diet and workout sessions seriously.

After I escorted her out of my apartment, I called my spiritual father’s line and pleaded to come see him even though it was very late already.
Rev. Iyua, the lead pastor of The Exalted Saviour Ministries, has been my spiritual head since I graduated from the school of ministry. The man has a large heart and, sensing the distress in my voice, had granted me an audience.

I have been getting signals of some looming battle ahead for a while now. My dreams and prayer sessions have been filled with dreadful foreboding over the past couple of weeks. Had I known that the devil was all out to tamper with my union with the love of my life, I would have been more alert to what I sensed God wanted to tell me.

This near accident was no mere coincidence, I knew. Something sinister was brewing. Maybe it was fate’s wicked claws toying with me, saying, either way, I wouldn’t get my heart’s desire.
I managed to gather myself together and drive carefully to my destination.

Rev. Iyua was already waiting for me when I arrived. I briefly greeted his wife and politely declined her attempts at hospitality even though I was hungry. Together, I and Rev. Iyua took a walk through the vast garden of his house, under the canopy of twinkling stars.

“What bothers you, my son, that you sounded so distressed over the phone?” Rev. Iyua asked as he perused me under the silvery glow of the moon.

I gulped and fought against the tears that welled in my eyes.

“Daddy, I’m just confused.”

Rev Iyua’s countenance grew serious. “About what?”

“Everything. It seems fate has decided to throw boulders at me and I’m tethering on the edge of death.”

“Fate? Death? You have me in the dark here, son.”

“I just got back from my fiancée’s house—”

“Oh, Nisha. How is she doing? I was just about to ask if you’ve finalized the venue for the reception…”

“Daddy! There might be no reception, no wedding even, with the way things are going. Nisha is… She’s dying.”

“What?” Rev Iyua looked dismayed.

“She has terminal breast cancer and she has decided to be admitted to the hospital starting tomorrow. Her hope has dwindled to zero and mine is shaking already.”

“Hmmm…” Long pause. “I see.”

“That’s not even the only strange thing. On my way to your place tonight, sir, I almost collided headlong with a trailer. I would have died. Seems like my life is just a puppet in fate’s cruel hands.”

Rev Iyua placed his hand on my shoulder and looked straight into my eyes with his bespectacled ones.

“We don’t hinge our lives, our identity in God, on fate. We anchor it on our faith in God.”

“What happens when it seems all the formula of faith you know fails you?” I asked.

“Oh, son, faith doesn’t operate by formula. It operates by blindly trusting God to do what humanly seems impossible.”

A moment of silence passed as I digested the profound truth I had just heard. It wasn’t some new Rhema; it just made more sense in my current dilemma. I sighed and ran my hand through my low-cut hair.

“Daddy, I will try. I’ll try to believe despite all odds. I can’t promise it’ll be a smooth ride, though.”

Rev Iyua smiled at me, probably satisfied with my resolution.

“That’s my son. About your wedding, it will happen in God’s time. There’s more to it than meets the eye and there’s a whole battle coming up against you because the enemy doesn’t want God’s glorious plan over your life to come to fulfilment.”

I stifled a groan. How many battles could one man take?
“So, what do I do?”

“You’ll intercede. And claim back what God has given you by faith.”

CHAPTER 4

(JUDITH)

“I can’t, Lord,” I cried, banging my hand on the tiled floor until it started to hurt. “I can’t. This is terrible timing. What will Nisha think?”

I had been praying that Nisha would get miraculously healed. It automatically became my weekly routine. Nisha slipped more and more into despair but I wasn’t going to let her go, not under my watch.

However, what God dropped like a bomb in my heart tonight, what he asked me to do, would be interpreted as nothing short of betrayal.
I’d thought that chapter was closed for good. Why was God doing this to me?

My heart clenched as I recalled all the revelations I’d received way back in the past that pointed to the fact that Austin was the ordained partner that God had prepared for me.
Things almost went haywire inside me when Austin proposed to Nisha.

Of course, neither of them was aware of my inner turmoil. I made sure of that, smiling and squealing with enthusiasm at the appropriate moments.
But inside, I was deflated.
Had I been wrong?
Had I been fantasizing about him because he was the picture-perfect dream man of every Christian girl within a 100-mile radius?

The decision to let him go was difficult, especially since Nisha and I live together and I had to endure their constant romantic oppression whenever he came over, but I had to. I loved Nisha and Austin too much to break their hearts. Plus, they seemed so sure of each other and had great convictions to back up their union. So, I cancelled all my dreams about Austin and didn’t let my disappointment show.

Now, what I heard the Holy Spirit telling me was ludicrous.
‘Go back to get your man?’
What man?
It was like the story of Abraham sacrificing Isaac and then God giving Abraham Isaac back. Only that, I was now scared of getting my Isaac back.

My phone rang but I ignored it. It continued incessantly until it got annoying. I should have put it in DND mode. Slightly pissed, I wiped my tears and checked my phone.

It was Austin. Oh great, perfect timing.
I frowned. Why was he calling me? And at this ungodly hour!

“Judith, where are you?” he asked, his voice very heavy with panic.

I swallowed the lump of fear suddenly rose in my throat.

“What is it?”

“Is Nisha with you?”

I looked at the time. 3:25 am.
“No, I left the house earlier and went to church for a vigil.”

I heard him mutter something I didn’t pick. He sounded like he was driving.

“Look, Judith, Nisha sent me a suicide note, on WhatsApp. I went over to your place immediately but she wasn’t there, neither were you…”

What? Oh no! I shouldn’t have left her. I should have seen the signs. What kind of a friend was I?

“Oh, God, please. Nisha, no, no!” I muttered, packing my Bible and shoving it into my tote bag as I hurried out of the church building.

“You’re at church, right? I’m coming over right now!” Austin said.

“No, no, we might be too late. I think I know where she might be. You go to the Roki beach. I’ll meet you there.”

“There’s no way you’ll get a cab at this hour, Judith. I’m coming to pick you up,” he said in a clipped tone.

Before I could protest, he cut off the line.

I ran out of the church gate after giving a quick explanation to the church gatekeeper that I had an emergency to attend to.

I walked on the lone street to the nearest streetlight.

“Oh, God,” I prayed as I allowed tears to fall. “Don’t let Nisha do anything stupid. Stop her before it’s too late.”
The rest of my prayers were jumbled pleadings mixed with a desperate cry in tongues.

When the headlights of Austin’s sleek Honda Accord entered my eyes a few minutes later, I almost sighed in relief.

I jumped in, buckled my belt and urged him to drive as fast as he could to the beach. Since it was night and there was no traffic, we would get there in 15 minutes max.

After a brief moment of driving, Austin gave me his phone, his grave face focused on the road.

Nisha’s message. Her number was saved as “LOML” on his phone. I tried not to wince.

I’m sorry. You don’t deserve a nuisance like me. I’m supposed to die anyway, so what’s the point in delaying any longer? Goodbye.

Why did she send a message to him but not to me? We were practically Siamese twins joined at the hip.

“Did she say anything at all to you to hint at what she planned to do?” Austin finally broke the terse silence.

I shook my head like my neck joint was dislocated. “No. She was slightly upset because her doctor called her this afternoon.”

Austin tightened his grip on the steering wheel and stepped on the gas. I could see the slight working of his lips. It dawned on me that he was praying for Nisha.
This was a man who loved to the end. Other men would have abandoned a hopeless case like Nisha. She was so lucky to have him…

“Don’t kill your Isaac to prove a point,” I heard the soft voice of the Holy Spirit say in my mind. “I was the one who asked you to sacrifice him to me, now I’m giving him back to you.”

Oh geez. Not now. Why wasn’t God saying anything about Nisha? Why was He distracting me with thoughts of Austin?

I glanced at Austin in the dim light of the car and it was as though I was seeing a halo and sparkles around him. My heart rate quadrupled. I gulped and looked away.

This was torture. I just wanted to curl up in my shirt and hide.

***

CHAPTER 5

(NISHA)

I got to the beach a long time ago. I stared at the water which was illuminated by the silvery moonlight.

The echoing voices of condemnation filled my head. The rope was there. The huge boulder was ready. But I just couldn’t move. I couldn’t feel anything. I was numb.

“εɳ∂ เƭ ɳσω! ყσµ’ɾε ωσɾƭɦℓεรร! ყσµ’ɾε ɳσƭɦเɳɠ ɓµƭ α ƭɦเεƒ, α ℓเαɾ, ɳσ σɳε ℓσѵεร ყσµ. ɳσƭ εѵεɳ ɠσ∂. ωɦყ εℓรε ωσµℓ∂ ɦε αℓℓσω รเcҡɳεรร เɳƭσ ყσµɾ ɓσ∂ყ? เƭ เร ɓεƭƭεɾ ƒσɾ ყσµ ƭσ ∂เε!”

Hot tears trailed my cheeks and I broke from the haze with my willpower, ready to get this over with. I took the rope, and tied one end securely to the boulder and the other around my neck.

Crying bitterly and grunting at intervals, I dragged the boulder with me to the edge of the ebbing water.
Flashes of what I had read after Judith left came back, tearing my heart to shreds.

I was feeling down this evening so when Judith asked me to follow her for a vigil, I turned down her offer with the excuse that I was not feeling too good.
But then, after a dinner of eggs and fruit smoothie, I got bored and decided to organize our room. That was when I found it.

“I’m sorry…” I whispered to the night air.

“STOP!” I heard the familiar voice of my best friend screeching, jolting me.

My pulse spiked as I whirled about and saw her racing towards me. Her eyes widened and she halted when she took in the scene and saw what I intended to do to myself.

Austin didn’t stop running. He came to me, yanked the rope off my neck and buried his face in my hair as he hugged me. He didn’t say anything but I could feel the tremors in his muscular body.

I slowly pulled away from him. He looked confused and scared.

“Babe…” he whispered hoarsely.

“Don’t babe me. Why didn’t you leave me alone? Sending that text was a stupid mistake,” I spat.

He cradled my face and I only felt more dirty. I couldn’t look into his eyes.
“Don’t do this to yourself, Nisha. Don’t do this to me,” he said.

Judith came closer, her face drenched with tears. I watched her as my stomach twisted in knots.

“Nisha, why?” she asked, her eyes pained. “You can tell me anything, you know that, right?”

“How could I? You’re keeping something from me, Judith,” I said, sobbing, “Stop the act.”

“So are you,” Judith retorted, her eyes pleading. “Why are you this way, Nisha? I told you we would fight this together.”

She wanted to hold my hands but I pushed her away, tears of guilt blurring my vision.

“I know, Judith. I read your old diary tonight. I know you love Austin,” I whispered but it was loud enough for them to hear.

Judith’s face turned as white as a sheet.

“What?” Austin gasped, his eyes darting wildly between us.

My heart ached because this revelation meant I would finally lose him but I couldn’t care less. All I wanted was to be free from the burden of my secret. It was time to speak up. Once they abandoned me in disgust, I would succumb to the call of death.

“Look, Austin, I’m sorry I was manipulative. I distracted you from her. I could tell that from the beginning you were attracted to her. I knew I was doomed not to have a stable happy home. Crio had made that threat several times—”

Austin’s eyes narrowed. “Who is this Crio?”

I sighed and hesitated. Would they believe me? Would they understand?

“Crio is… Um, well, he is my spirit husband,” I muttered.

If Judith was white before, now she was colourless. I could almost hear her thoughts: ‘Do I know this girl I claimed was my best friend at all?’

I wouldn’t blame her though.
I was so good at hiding secrets. Years of childhood abuse taught me that skill.
Anytime I would wake from nightmares and Judith tried to ask what it was about, I would either tell her that I didn’t remember or that I was reliving the news of my mom’s death.

The sound of the crashing waves filled the terse silence.

“Most of what you know about me is a lie. I’m not the perfect Christian girl you think I am. So you see why I just want to die…” I said, backing away from them as I neared the water again.

“Yҽʂ, ƚԋαƚ’ʂ ɯԋαƚ ყσυ’ʅʅ υʂҽ ƚσ ɾҽԃҽҽɱ ყσυɾʂҽʅϝ.”

Oh no! Crio’s voice was back. I panicked.

Judith finally found her voice and yelled, “Nisha, now is not a time for us to open wounds. I know you are under a lot of pressure. You’re scared. But let us help you. As long as there is life, there is hope. Remember, Jesus died so you wouldn’t have to.”

I felt anger that was not mine bubble up within me like a volcano. Suddenly, like a switch, I felt like I was being thrown down an invisible tunnel and I knew then that Crio had gone overboard, taking control of my body.

“∂σɳ’ƭ ɱσѵε αɳყ cℓσรεɾ,” I heard his inhumane growl. “เƒ ყσµ ɱσѵε, เ ωเℓℓ ҡเℓℓ ɦεɾ ɱყรεℓƒ.”

The exchange was blurred and I was the passive distant observer, but I knew what was happening. Austin and Judith had come face to face with my inner demon and they had to battle him.

Crio was a very crafty smooth talker. I knew if they would conquer him, I had to resist him deliberately from within

So, as I curled up in my mind, I did the only thing that seemed reasonable at that moment. I cried desperately to God.
“I’m sorry, Lord. Please help me. I don’t want to be trapped anymore…”

That was it. The key to victory.
I felt my body go limp and crumple on the sand. Everything turned grey then black.

When my eyes fluttered open briefly, I noticed that I was lying in the backseat of Austin’s speeding car, my head on Judith’s lap. Judith was stroking my hair, compassion brimming in her eyes as she gazed at me.

Then she whispered a prayer that I didn’t understand. “Lord, at the end of the day, I am glad I didn’t compromise.”

***

CHAPTER 6

(AUSTIN)

Dawn came too fast. Today, I had a live presentation scheduled for an international investor who wants to sponsor my tech startup and there was no way I could miss it even though I wished to stay to care for Nisha.
I was a mess, both physically and mentally, thanks to the events of last night.

After I had used the authority of the word of God, backed up with Judith’s intercessory prayers, to cast that vile demon out of Nisha’s body—a battle that lasted about an hour—I suggested that we take Nisha to the hospital so she could recuperate.
Judith insisted that it was a bad idea. What if we were asked to leave her alone to rest and a rebound happened? I saw the logic in that line of thought so I drove them to their apartment.

“I have to go,” I said to Judith after Nisha had been tucked into bed and we had said prayers over her.

She nodded her reply. After the whole drama at the beach, she had spoken very little to me. I guessed she was embarrassed. I was still in a bit of shock and confusion about what Nisha said. I didn’t know how to process that.

As I made to go out the door, she called out, “Austin…”

I paused and turned slightly, my brows raised in question.

She sighed and came to stand before me. I noticed her dishevelled look and the bags underneath her eyes, but there was this tangible glow of compassion around her.
The confrontation with that Crio demon had taken its toll on her, yes, but she was undoubtedly the kind of friend that stuck closer than a sister through thick and thin.

Her voice was small when she spoke.
“I know it all seems crazy and hard to take in, what you heard Nisha say, but it’s true. I never intend to be the girl who snatches her best friend’s fiance. I just wrote the things God told me about you. My hands are also tied here. Why don’t you ask God yourself?”

I couldn’t say anything. Ask God again? I had prayed before I proposed to Nisha and even got permission from my spiritual father, Rev. Iyua.
I loved Nisha and had peace about our relationship, didn’t I?
She was the perfect package of all I wanted—independent, beautiful and godly—not until these ugly realities began to rear their heads.

As I drove home, I did ask questions and prayed in tongues to clear my jumbled thoughts. Slowly, the Holy Spirit started connecting the dots in my mind.

“You received an answer according to the desire of your heart, son. You were so myopic and self-centred that you didn’t ask me what I wanted for you. Judith is my will for you, Austin. Nisha was only supposed to be the link.”

While I was in the shower, I screamed to release the pent-up frustration in me.

“Why, Lord? Why didn’t you tell me until now? I had peace. I thought that was supposed to be your approval. Now, everything is so messed up,” I said.

“I kept trying to tell you but you deliberately ignored me. This whole trigger via Nisha’s diagnosis is my way to heal and redirect all of you because I love you.”

I partly knew why I was resisting. Judith couldn’t contest with Nisha’s beauty. She was the moon to Nisha’s sun. If not for Nisha picking her from the trenches, Judith would be nothing.
Besides, though I respected Judith, I didn’t have feelings like that for her.

After I came out of the shower and dried myself, I saw my revelation journal on my desk. I felt the urge to pick it. As I flipped through it, I came to the place where I started recording the convictions I had concerning Nisha.

As I reread them it was as though a scale was lifted from my eyes and I began to see all the pointers to the fact that God had been telling me it was Judith who was the one for me.
Everything became clear. Oh, bother! I had been so wrong all along. I knew what I had to do, but it looked so impossible at this juncture.

Nisha still had a long way to go. Who knew if she would ever recover from her sickness and whatever haunted her in her past? If I did what God was telling me, I would be tagged a fool and a traitor.

I managed to don my clothes and head out. Breakfast was out of the question. I was already running late.

Thankfully, I got to the office just in time.

While I was in the meeting, I was very distracted. My mind kept wandering to all the moments when Judith and I had interacted. I remembered all her support and love without malice toward Nisha and me.
She sure was strong to have silently borne the pain of knowing she was meant for me.

At one point, I groaned aloud. I apologized to the startled attendees of the ongoing meeting. My PA had to stand in for me while I excused myself to the gents.

As I paced in front of the mirror, God asked me a question that I didn’t understand.

“Austin, who is more relevant, the one who plants or the one who waters?”

I scrunched my brows, wondering what that had to do with my current turmoil.

I knew He was waiting for my response so I pulled up the corresponding scripture from my memory bank.

“1Cor.3.7 So then neither he who plants is anything, nor he who waters, but God who gives the increase.”

“Nisha isn’t your seed, nor the soil where your purpose partner will blossom. Though flawed, she is just the instrument to plough the ground and water the seed. That’s why she was the one who led Judith to me and even groomed her. All that was part of my perfect plan to bring you and my daughter, Judith, together. But you were so distracted by the gardener that you ignored me, the Lord, the one who gives the increase.”

I ran my fingers through my hair and looked into the mirror.
My brain was about to explode.

I had to go on a personal retreat ASAP. But before that, a visit to Rev. Iyua would be necessary. He was a man of great discernment and I trusted that he wouldn’t mislead me. I had enough proof that he was a true servant of God. I had a feeling he had foreknowledge of all that God was now making clear to me.

I just didn’t know what to do, or how to begin afresh.

***

CHAPTER 7

(JUDITH)

I awoke and unconsciously patted the side of my bed, as it had been my custom for the past years that I lived with Nisha.
Ruby stretched and shook his furry body.

The weight of stone dropped into my stomach again when I saw the spot where Nisha would have been, now occupied by my new puppy.

I dragged myself up, rubbed my eyes and knelt by my bed for my quiet time. I must confess, my mind was swarmed with bittersweet memories as I fought to focus on God.
Today was a very special day. A day to remember the good times, and to drown out the sad times.

If anyone had told me around this time last year that I would be a lone ranger without the lady I had come to see as my covenant sister by my side, I would have rebuked the enemy.
We were sisters. We shared every single thing and even slept on the same bed.
Not anymore.

After I finished my chores and freshened up, I left the house and headed to the flower shop with Ruby accompanying me. I got a bunch of fresh white carnations—Nisha’s favourite flowers.

While I drove to my destination, I watched the buildings, vehicles and people as they flew by. The events after that day at the beach came back like a tsunami.

After Nisha’s first deliverance, she still underwent a lot of sessions of deliverance and therapy, thanks to Rev Iyua and his lovely wife who was a professional psychologist.
Nisha became free but her health didn’t improve.
Those moments were our closest bonding moments.
God taught me the true art of love and intercession.
After a while, her health got so bad that she had to be bedridden in our shared apartment. I bought her an expensive golden retriever puppy to cheer her up—she named it Ruby.

I kept believing that she would get better. I never saw it coming. No one did.
Austin was the worst hit. He simply disappeared. After her funeral, the next thing I heard was that he had left for a missionary trip to Madagascar.
I was shocked and confused. He had left everything, his business, his low-key ministry here, and me. I suspected I was the major reason he was running away.

It felt as though my whole world had ground to a halt. I was like a petal bobbing up and down in an endless ocean, lost, disoriented. Only God and the company of sweet little Ruby kept me sane.

Today was Nisha’s death anniversary. It’s been one year since she went to be with the Lord. On getting to the cemetery, I waved to the keepers at the gate and promised to give them something on my way out.

With slow steps, holding Ruby’s leash, I went to her marked gravestone.
The embossed cursive epigraph read:
Nisha, Princess of Lightning, a heroine of faith. Fought to the end. Rests in the bosom of the Lord.

I took in a shuddering breath and dropped the bouquet on the glittering marble.

I stood there staring, having no words to express how I felt. Wasn’t time supposed to have waned the pain?

“I miss you, Nisha. I can never forget you.”

Teardrops slid down my cheeks till I could taste salt.

I sniffed. “Remember what you told me the night before you left? Well, it seems like your prediction was off point…”

I smiled wistfully as I recalled what she had said.

That night, she was in high spirits and her normally pale face was filled with colour. She begged me to put a wig on her then-bald head and plait it. It was a silly request but I happily obliged. I had been optimistic that perhaps the miracle had started.

“Judith, when you and Austin get together, I want you to know you have my blessing. Don’t feel guilty. I want you to take good care of him. He is a good man.”

I chuckled dryly and said, “Looks like that is not ever going to happen. Austin has been treating me with a polite distance as if I’m his grandma…”

Nisha had tugged my hand till I squatted to reach her eye level. Her eyes twinkled and a playful smirk was on her lips.

“He loves you, Judith. He’s just too scared to admit it. I’ve seen how he looks at you when he thinks neither of us is looking. I know he’s trying to be good to me since we’re still officially engaged. That man is stubborn; I don’t know why he has refused to break it off.”

I rolled my eyes. “Miss Nisha. Stop the fanciful talk and just get better quickly.”

Her eyes filled with moisture and said softly, “I love you, Judith.”

I laughed and playfully rubbed her cheek. “Awww… I love you too, Princess of Lightning.”

The next morning, she lay peacefully on the bed, lifeless. I think my scream of shock at the realization that she was gone was what woke the entire neighbourhood. I was unable to function for days. Thankfully, the Holy Spirit slowly comforted my hurting heart over time.

Now, standing in front of her grave, I tucked my hair behind my ear. “Well, Austin has vanished. No calls, no nothing. I don’t know if I’m still supposed to wait…” I said with a sigh.

“No need to wait anymore.”

My head snapped up, my eyes widened and I couldn’t feel any part of my body except my madly beating heart.

Austin?

He continued speaking from behind me. “Judith. I’m sorry for disappearing. I knew God’s instructions but I first had to sort out some things.”

He sighed loudly and I finally turned to look at him. Oh, good Lord! He looked much more alive than the last time I saw him at Nisha’s funeral. His beard was neatly trimmed and his hair was styled in a way that made his eyes more appealing.

“I couldn’t stop thinking of you, Judith. I even secretly stalked you on social media. Your unconditional loving spirit has a unique refreshing aroma that I can’t resist. I just knew I would find you here today.”

He slowly went down on one knee and brought out a small white box.

I couldn’t breathe for a split second.

“Austin, what are you doing?”

He nervously opened the box to reveal an intricately patterned silver ring and cleared his throat. “I know this isn’t an ideal location for something this sensitive and I know you might want some time to process my request. But please, Judith, can you do me the honour of being the woman I’ll do life with?”

My tears fell fast. I moved to him and made him stand.

“I’ll grow old this minute if I have to wait any longer. My answer is yes, Austin. Let’s make this work, by God.”

He looked relieved and surprised. “Wow, Holy Spirit, that was easier than expected,” he muttered to himself before finally helping me wear the ring. “Thank you for saying yes, Judith.”

As I admired the ring, emotion clogged my voice and I glanced at Nisha’s grave.
“Think she’ll be happy with us?

Austin pulled me into a hug. “Of course, she’s in heaven. She’ll be eternally happy. Besides, God orchestrated this, and that’s all that matters.”

As I hugged him back and wept into his shirt, Ruby raced around our legs, yapping in glee.

***

CHAPTER 8

(AUSTIN)

Even before I opened the door, I heard her melodic voice wafting from the kitchen where I guessed she must be preparing an early dinner.

I did my best to be as quiet as I could be as I made my way to the kitchen.

Ruby spoiled my surprise plan when he began to bark and leap in circles the moment he sensed my presence.

Judith spun to look at me and smirked as she watched Ruby trying to jump on me. Her hair was plastered to her brows, proof that she must have been busy with chores before she started cooking. Even in this domestic state, she was beautiful in her simple way.

“Welcome, stalker,” she said. “You didn’t tell me you’d be visiting. Thank God I just started cooking. You’re waiting for dinner, yeah. It’s just 6 pm and our curfew is not till 8 pm.”

I patted Ruby and gave him the biscuit bone snack he loved so much.
“Judith, you should be more security conscious. How many times do you want me to remind you that doors are meant to be locked?”

She chuckled and returned to resume chopping the vegetables.

Oh, boy! Her wavy movements were so rapturous that I couldn’t wait for our wedding, which was just two weeks away, to be done.
I would wrap her in my arms from behind and plaster kisses all over…
I quickly shook the dangerous thoughts out of my head.

“Patience, Austin. Our purity testimony will not be soiled in Jesus’ name,” I internally chided myself.

I put my hands in my pocket and suddenly found the decorative wall tiles very interesting. Getting a grip on my emotions, I fixed my attention back to what she was saying.

“… I have Ruby. Plus angels have got my back. So, relax, husband-to-be.”

I rolled my eyes and brought forward the nylon I had been hiding behind me.

“I got something for you.”

She skipped over to me like a child.
The gift was something I knew she liked, from the times I had observed her friendship with Nisha. A box of chocolates, a bucket of chocolate and vanilla-flavoured ice cream and a bottle of grape wine.

“Wow! Austin. This is too much. Thank you.”

“Anything for you, dear. Plus, we have to celebrate.”

We settled down to eat and I told her everything.

“My investor from two years ago that I thought I had lost. Well, he came back. Told me he wanted to begin processing the paperwork for the investment.”

“That’s wonderful news. Praise God!” Judith said. “I have something to tell you too.”

I had already sensed that Judith enjoyed a great day with the way she was in high spirits. But I wasn’t expecting what she said.

“I got a real job!”

I blinked in shock. I didn’t know how to feel about that. Judith was a free bird. She hated 9-5 jobs, she had once told me. And that was why she was freelancing as a data analyst.

“Are you cool with that?” I asked.

She shrugged and beamed. “The manager is a nice man. He saw my portfolio online and asked for an interview. He’s so thrilled to have me on his team. I’ll still be working remotely.”

The unsettling feeling from when I had received the call from my investor returned, compounding in my chest. I quietly leaned back and sipped my wine juice.

“What’s wrong?” Judith asked. Gosh, she read me like a book.

“I don’t know. I feel uneasy about this happy news.”

She sighed.
“I must confess it was the same with me but I didn’t want to be the spoilsport. Let’s confirm from God first, don’t you think? These are major changes and if we’re going to be married, we must cultivate the habit of receiving direction from God before getting too excited.”

I smiled and nodded. I loved how our hearts were in sync.

After we had cleared our plates, we moved to her living room to pray, Hillsong worship playing softly in the background. It was an ethereal slice of heaven on earth.

The voice of the Holy Spirit came to me after moments of praying in other tongues.

“What do you think I meant when I said in Luke.11.33 – No man, when he hath lighted a candle, putteth it in a secret place, neither under a bushel, but on a candlestick, that they which come in may see the light?

“No man can do that. But am I a man? I put my most treasured lights under the covering of my wings, away from the eyes of the world, until I so please.”

The signal from that response was clear. We had to reject both our offers and fix our trust in him solely. I didn’t understand why, though, but I wanted to obey God.

I told Judith what I received and she confirmed it.

When we were done, it was already 8:12 pm. I didn’t realize that time had flown by that quickly.

Since I already exceeded curfew time, I had to report myself to my spiritual father, Rev Iyua, and I wasn’t looking forward to the scolding I was sure to receive.

As I drove out, I wished I could stay longer to dissect that word from God further with Judith. I wanted to uncover the full essence of what God was trying to tell us in that verse.

With the way things were moving, since we wouldn’t have the extra money to assist with the wedding expenses, we would spend the next two weeks intensively planning and budgeting.

~~~

As Judith walked down the aisle of the church, her bright eyes fixed on mine, my breath stilled. Even in the simple white ball gown, she looked like an angel floating towards me. Her smile was like the sun. I didn’t even mind that a light shower started a few minutes into the church wedding.

We exchanged our vows as led by Rev Iyua and sealed our promise with a kiss that lit up my heart.

The reception followed after, right in the church compound.

As I stayed in the couple’s tent with my new bride beside me on the decorated chaise lounge, I breathed in the heady scent of her perfume and hair conditioner.

“Hey, hubby,” she teased, grinning like a little child.

“Hey, wifey,” I answered and then landed a peck on her nose. She swatted me away but I pulled her into my arms.

“I’m so blessed to have you,” she finally said dreamily.

“Same here,” I whispered into her ear.

“You know, I can’t help but imagine that she’s here, witnessing our union, smiling over us. I mean, this mild rainfall is spiced with lightning. I think she’s winking at us from heaven.”

My heart clenched. I also missed Nisha. Once upon a time, I had imagined my late friend would be the one in my arms. But God had other, better plans.

I rubbed Judith’s shoulder. “Don’t you dare cry on your wedding day,” I said.

We fell into a comfortable silence while the jubilant music continued outside our veiled love tent.

As I reclined better on the couch when Judith said she wanted to go get a slice of the chocolate cake for both of us, I heard the unmistakable voice of the Holy Spirit. And my mind conversation with Him began.

“Congratulations on passing the first test of purpose.”

My head swelled. “Thanks for everything, Lord.”

“We’re moving to the next phase, Austin. You’re leaving.”

I frowned, confused. “Leaving? To where?”

“Relax, lover boy. I’m not planning to break apart what I just joined.” His voice held a hint of humour before turning serious once more.
“You and your bride will settle in Madagascar after your honeymoon.”

I broke into a brisk humourless chuckle on the inside.
“You’re kidding, right?”

No response.

Uh-oh! He wasn’t pulling my legs. I swiftly began my protesting spree.

“Lord, Madagascar is full of savages. I thought going there then was just a temporary retreat. I’m not a missionary, for crying out loud. I’m a businessman.”

“Will you choose to stay in the shadows for my sake or will you love to be in the spotlight at the expense of my approval?”

“But… What will Judith say—?”

“She already knows. She’s my Daughter of Thunder. I’ve been preparing her for you for a long time. She will go with you everywhere I send you both.”

I put my hands into my hair and steadied my breath. Unshed tears pricked the back of my eyes.

“This is crazy, crazy timing, Lord. Not an ideal wedding gift if you ask me. But… I chose to hide under the shadow of your wings forever even if it means obscurity.”

***

CHAPTER 9

(JUDITH)

Humming a tune to myself, I did my best to wipe the stains on the floor. I was careful to stand straight, conscious of the bulge on my belly.

Despite Austin’s hesitation to leave me this evening, I insisted he go over to visit the dying woman that he’d been called to pray for.
My condition couldn’t be the reason he wouldn’t help a soul in need.

“I’ll be fine,” I had told him as I shooed him out the door that morning.

His eyes were uncertain.
“Call me if you need anything, darling,” he had said and placed a warm assuring kiss on my forehead before dashing out after the woman’s son who had come to fetch him.

I made sure to utter prayers for him after he had gone.

A month after our beautiful honeymoon, we relocated to Madagascar as God had instructed us. I leased out the apartment that belonged to Nisha—since she didn’t really have a family she wouldn’t have minded—and of course, sweet Ruby came along. The little pup was now a grown-up dog.
We joined a missionary community, the same that Austin had come along with the first time he came here.
We were practically living like refugees. Without a home to our name or any tangible property to call ours, we lived in the countryside penthouse the mission could afford to give us.

Now, I was relatively acclimatized and had made some great relationships with the locals in the one year we had spent here so things weren’t that bad. It was necessary because I was now pregnant.

Our assignment was to the category of people whom the world classified as broken. Those who didn’t fit into the over-religious church system—drunks, drug addicts, abused people and the like—but who sought freedom. It was a rough task, honestly, but I was learning to love in ways I didn’t know was possible before. Our house had become a hub for all sorts of outcasts. Some of the ladies suffering from traumas of sexual abuse reminded me of Nisha. Many times, when we had to conduct deliverance sessions on these people, I would have flashbacks of Nisha.

On rare occasions, like today, the house would be empty, giving me time to myself.

I leaned the mop stick on the wall and sighed. Glancing at the clock, I frowned and rubbed my taut belly. It was already 9:00 pm.

I was seriously craving peppered beef jerky and I hoped by some crazy miracle Austin would know what I wanted and get it for me—which was an almost impossible wish. I did my best to busy myself to divert my attention.

It’s been over two hours since he left and I was beginning to feel lonely. I had finished the unnecessary chores I ventured into and I suddenly felt the compulsion to journal out my emotions.
There was no electricity to power the TV but my laptop still had some juice.
What if I wrote a sort of encouragement letter to my future self? The idea sounded absurd at first but it soon became quite sensible.

My laptop was already rusty but it came in handy. With divine permission, I was still able to get a few gigs here and there that provided money that catered for our food and other necessities.

I opened a fresh document and began typing a letter to my future self.

To the ten years older me,

Dear Judith,

You’re 37 now. How time flies! I’m sure you’re still as tight with the Holy Spirit as you were 10 years ago.

Remember the day Nisha called you daughter of thunder? I do hope you’re living up to that name. Remember how you came up with that name?
Lightning and thunder are 5 and 6. When Jesus called James and John sons of thunder, it resonated with you both and you gave yourselves that title. And, come to think of it, it was like prophecy. Since Nisha was Lightning, she came first, but for a brief flash. Judith, you are more enduring, and the sound of your roar must reverberate through the earth.
I’m sure you still miss Nisha. Her memory is forever etched in your mind.

I don’t know where you are right now. Maybe you’re still in Madagascar or you’ve been tossed by God to the center of the Kalahari desert. *Inserts nervous laughter* (I sincerely hope not.)
Either way, I want to let you know no matter what you’re facing now, it pays to serve Jesus. Trusting him pays off every single time.

Yes, it’s not easy. It takes a lot of tears and trying to reason things out with God. The flesh wants comfort, so it fights the Spirit. But those who are led by the Spirit of God are the true sons and daughters of God. Always remember that.

On to more intimate matters. Don’t let your respect and love for the man God has given you wane. Austin needs you. The work God has laid on his hands is not something he can bear alone. He needs your hand, your support, and your prayers to be able to pull through.

I do hope you have a girl. But no matter the number or gender of children God blesses you with, remember to point them to Jesus.

Also, if you ever—

I stopped typing abruptly, my fingers hovering over my keyboard as I squeezed my face.
A sharp pain radiated from the pit of my belly and reached the tip of my toes. When the pain subsided and I slowly rose, I saw that my water had broken. Severe panic welled in me.

Oh no! I was three weeks early. Had I stressed myself too much? And no one was at home with m
Oh no! I was three weeks early. Had I stressed myself too much? And no one was at home with me.
I had to call Austin.

Ruby, who had been lounging quietly in his corner, stood alert and gave a sharp bark.

“Quiet, Ruby,” I ordered through gritted teeth. He gave me a soulful look through his big brown eyes and whimpered.

Huffing and puffing as I bent over, slowly marching to the stool where my phone lay, I sent SOS prayers up to Heaven.

“God, please…”

Just then, the front door lock turned. Thank goodness. Austin was back.

Austin had decided that I had a bad habit of leaving the doors open, so he made it a rule that he would lock the door after himself anytime he had to leave the house to a short distance.

Maybe it was relief, maybe it was my overdrive hormones, I don’t know, but the moment I saw Austin’s frame enter the living room, I suddenly felt weak and slumped unconscious on the floor.

***

CHAPTER 10

(AUSTIN)

“Jayden, where is your sister? We’ll be late!” I said as I finished tying my tie’s knot.

“Mommy is dressing her!” my five-year-old son said, grinning impishly as he clambered to the top of our neatly laid bed and began his usual morning routine of bouncing.

“Jayden, get off that bed this instant,” I said in a firm voice.

He giggled and I puffed out a breath of air. I knew what he wanted—the chase, the tickling, the cuddling/piggyback ride—but now wasn’t an ideal time for play.
Apart from the fact that we would be late for service if we didn’t leave within the next ten minutes, I had been trying to use this silent period to speak to God.

The thing was, the chief missionary pastor had an emergency call that necessitated him leaving town yesterday evening and his assistant wasn’t feeling too well. So they had assigned me the task of addressing the group of youth we had gathered over the years. We had grown to a large number of about 700 people and we held our meetings in a makeshift warehouse.

I was nervous and blank on what to share with the mixed multitude of those eager, desperate souls.
After the dealing of God a few years ago when he threw me into the shadows, I had not been much of a do-it-all guy anymore. And I saw the wisdom in that, now that I was a bit older. I didn’t think I was ready to be seen so publicly again.

My missionary role included all sorts of obscure work—majorly praying in the secret place for the souls we were sent to rescue for the Kingdom. Sometimes, I would be the one to go to prison to bail out some of those struggling people who got in trouble or regressed to their former lifestyle.

There have been lots of ups and downs over the years we’ve been in Madagascar. For example, many spiritual attacks on me and my family, the time I was arrested for no reason, or abject hunger sometimes.

Aside from those occasional glitches, my family life was amazing. I understood why God blessed me with Judith. She was everything and more. Humble, supportive, prayerful and loving. I couldn’t have asked for a better wife.

Since I couldn’t work full-time, I adopted Judith’s freelance style. Using my expertise in tech and business, I became a virtual consultant for tech businesses. At least, God had given us that permission to do things that would make us assets not liabilities to the work of God.

Then, there were my wonderful kids. Jayden came dramatically. I still remember the day he came prematurely. I almost had a panic attack. I didn’t have the money to afford a Caesarean Section, so I prayed frantically that God would intervene and he did. Judith came to and was invigorated enough to give birth to Jayden. His little sister, Silver, came along two years ago and he became the doting older brother.

With his large adorable eyes and heart-melting smile, it was hard to stay angry at him for too long. Jayden was very intelligent and active and had the purest heart. He was also very intuitive. Even though he was young, he had an unusual connection with God. Sometimes I marvelled when he would pray innocently to God or relay some dreams he had to his mom and me casually over dinner.

“Come here, big boy!” I said, “You don’t want to get your church clothes all wrinkled, now do you?”

He tried to adjust my tie, copying what he had seen his mother doing for me often.

“You like it?” I asked, tapping the tip of his nose.

He giggled and nodded.

“Daddy,” he called and placed his palms on my cheeks to make me face him directly. His gaze was earnest. “Why are you worrying?”

I made a funny face. “Do I look like I am worried?”

He didn’t laugh. He just stared at me.

I decided to be fleetingly transparent. Though Judith had done her large share of her pep talk and prayers for me after our separate quiet times this morning, I knew I had to be real. Jayden seemed like my only other choice. Plus, he wouldn’t think too much of it.

“Well, Daddy is scared of the crowd he is going to face,” I said.

“Don’t be scared, Daddy. Jesus is with you. Why worry when you have him?”

I chuckled at how the roles were reversed. My boy was encouraging me.

I knew the Holy Spirit was my muse, always. And he was calling me, telling me to rest in Him. It was amazing how God could speak even from the mouths of babes and sucklings.

The door opened and Judith, dressed in her beautiful coral gown and her silky hair braided with beads to match her daughter’s style, came in, carrying sleepy-eyed Silver.
Ruby slowly trotted in after them. This faithful dog was now old and I knew he would soon pack up.
Jayden would miss him when he was gone.

“Hey, darling,” I said, placing a quick kiss on her lips. I patted Silver’s hair and the girl just continued sucking her fingers in bliss.
“Ready to go?”

“As I’ll ever be. Let’s go,” Judith said.

I saw the switch in her expression when she saw the mess Jayden had made on the bed. But she didn’t say anything.

Thirty minutes later, we arrived at the warehouse-turned-auditorium. The worship session began and it was ethereal watching many young people whose lives were once hopeless now worshipping the God who gave them another chance.

When it was my moment to speak, I breathed a quick word of prayer and went to the podium.

“I have seen God’s faithfulness in countless ways over the years. When it looked foolish to obey God’s instruction, I did. You should surrender to Him too. He is calling you. There’s this song that I’ve fallen in love with and I want us to sing it together:

Who is calling my name o?
Jesus is calling my name o,
Jesus if you call my name,
I will answer a billion times…”

We sang that song and spoke in tongues until we began to ascend.

Then, the most unusual thing began to happen. People began to pour out in droves to give their lives to Jesus or to rededicate their hearts to him.

It was a raw revival. God revealed Himself and I could feel His presence so tangibly. I was in awe as God brought mighty deliverances and healings to the hungry souls.

I noticed that at a point, Jayden’s excitement spiked and he kept tugging Judith’s arm and pointing up, arms swinging around as he gesticulated wildly.

“He sees my angels,” the Holy Spirit said to me. “He is pure of spirit and will someday do my bidding just as his father has.”

I trembled in awe of God. I felt so blessed to have my baby boy to be chosen by God. I made a silent prayer that he would grow to be all God intended him to be.

All I could do as I finally knelt behind the podium after several hours was to say “Thank you, Jesus,” over and over again.

Many people remained sprawled on the floor, crying out to God even after we had shared the grace.

The norm was that we would stay behind after each service to counsel, but the assistant pastor who was miraculously healed in the course of the service allowed us to leave earlier since the kids were already fussing due to hunger. Besides, it was quite evident on our faces that we needed rest. The weather showed signs of a coming thunderstorm.

Judith herded the children into the backseat of our car and buckled them in.

When I buckled in my seat belt, I noticed Judith looking at me with wonder in her eyes.

“What?” I asked.

She slowly shook her head and said, “Nothing. I’m just thanking God for your growth, husband. I know how fidgety you were this morning about having to address the people. Look what God did.”

I smiled and glanced at the backseat where Jayden was playing with his Lego set.

“A very wise boy once said, why worry when you have Jesus? He reminded me that I didn’t have to seek inspiration from myself, not when I had the true and greatest muse of all time beckoning on me.”

“He is very wise indeed,” Judith said, smiling back at me knowingly. “I bet he takes after his mother.”

I laughed.

“Judith, I don’t know what I’d be without your support. I’m grateful for you standing by me through thick and thin, when I’m agreeable and when I’m annoying.”

“Sheesh, you practically say this every day, Austin,” she replied, chuckling.

I drew her nearer and stole a quick kiss. Lightning flashed through the sky and I sensed it was God flashing a brilliant smile at us.

***

Discussion Questions

Which character did you relate with the most in this story? Why?
What was your reaction when you discovered that Judith was in love with Austin?
Nisha kept secrets from her best friend and fiance for reasons best known to her. Do you have someone you can share your darkest secrets with? Someone you trust that can help you through it?

We see that Austin had a spiritual father figure he could run to in his downtime. What’s your take on mentorship in the body of Christ?
When it seems like faith is failing, what biblical steps can we take to stir it up once again? Do you ever feel like fate controls your life more than faith does?
When it was revealed that Nisha died, what emotions did you feel? Do you feel it’s unfair that good people have to die?
God sent Austin to the jungles of Madagascar even though he had a well-established life already. If you are given an open cheque to choose between the shadows and the spotlight, which will you go for?
Are you in a relationship with someone of the opposite sex? Remember how Austin and Judith had a curfew time? Do you think this is an inconvenience or wisdom?
Just like Judith did, can you write a letter to your future self today? Advise on mistakes to avoid and what to focus on.
Out of the mouth of babes and sucklings… Jayden, their little boy, was a conduit for God to speak to Austin. Do you think children have the potential to be greatly used by God even in their tender age? Can you give biblical and real-life proof?